It’s all very well liking stuff online and clicking that little heart you see at the bottom of all those social media posts, but do you know what, if you really want to help the small-time side-hustles and businesses online then below are a bunch of ways that you can actually support the brands you love.

Buy our shit

Seriously. This more than anything. It means we get money so we don’t have to spend as long enduring dead-end employment (not that we’d ever tell you we work in a succession of weird and soul-destroying occupations). You buying our shit also means we can eat. Little known fact is that eating eventually turns into sarcastic words and unusual things printed onto paper and/or fabric.

Tell people about our shit

“Hey Daphne! I found this awesome site that takes the piss out of stuff and sells things alternative people like you and goths might like. It’s at

Miriam, probably.

Said no one ever.

Follow our shit

Those numbers on social media? The ones that show how many people who follow you? You know the ones… to us they’re teeny-tiny hits of dopamine.

I’m a fucking depressive and so these little hits are usually all that sustain me through the long dark winter of the soul. Go follow our Instagram. Help me survive the winter.

Promote our shit

The corpse of a dove and an eldritch concoction made of sputum, cloves and ash from a stake that has pierced the heart of a vampire should do the trick. You know what to do: Support the brands you love.

Dystopiconic Dee

Dystopiconic Dee

I will follow you home and keep you.